Summer's over. My dorm hall is mostly vacant and the smell of bleach and the sounds of vacuums are taking over. Last night people were up late into the night crying and saying their last goodbyes. For most, college starts soon, for others a job back home is calling. As for me, I'm staying here.

I'm still trying to process all the events that have led to this moment. The tears and late night talks with Jesus that have gotten me to this point. I'm confident that this is where I'm supposed to be. I'm confident that his plan is better than anything I could ever dream up but that doesn't keep me from wondering where I go from here. Staying in North Carolina and taking this internship is one of the biggest life decisions that I've made over my short life thus far. I've never been able to identify with Peter in the boat more than now.

I was reading through some of my past blog posts over the last couple years and I was brought to tears when they reminded me of the Lord's goodness. I was reminded that I planned on moving here in Spring 2018 until all the doors shut. And now as I write this it's Summer 2018 and the Lord has said "now it's time." I'm learning that sometimes God's answer isn't "yes" or "no." Sometimes his answer is just "wait."

Until the next step, I'm resting in the overwhelming peace that he has covered me with. I'm resting in knowing that although my situations and circumstances may be ever changing he isn't.

In the fall I was supposed to move in with my best friend and start my first semester at the university in the social work program. Slowly and then all at once all of that was taken from me one way or another. My car blew up and all other plans fell through. I cried and every day I woke up asking God "what the heck are you doing?" I loved school and I wanted so badly to be able to have the best friend roomie experience. After finally getting to a point where I was comfortable and content at school and in my social life all of it was being taken away.

At the end of every year,  I think back on the things that have happened good and bad over the last 365 days. Every year is unique with its special mix of hills and valleys, but this year was way more eventful in so many ways.